No Move for Us

the kid walking into high school

by Michelle Lasley

Michelle Lasley is a mother, wife in Pacific Northwest learning to balance green dreams with budget realities.

October 3, 2021

Well, we didn’t move. No move for us. We will be staying in the Pacific Northwest for an unknown amount of time. It could be the rest of the school year, and we try again in the spring, or if the kid thrives at school – we could be looking at another 4 years, minimum. Either way, right now, there is no move for us.

No more false promises of moving in x, y, or z years. I don’t think my heart can take it anymore. I wanted to move here. I moved here of my own choice, on my own, nearly 18 years ago. I have met so many amazing people along the way and have literally carved a life for myself. My husband also came on his own and stumbled into staying. And, we stumbled into each other, and for the last, nearly 15 years, we have haphazardly carved a life for ourselves (sometimes we plan super intentionally, and sometimes not).

The husband has never liked it here (except for the amazing nights, access to oceans and mountains, and steady paycheck) and has always wanted to go back to our mutual home of Michigan. And, then somewhere around 2017 or 2018, Portland no longer held me with its rose-colored glasses. And, I, too, wanted to move back. And, we have been planning for this move back to Michigan since, banking on the narrow window of timing when the kid leaves his grammar/middle school and before entering high school.

In all our planning, we never planned on a global pandemic made more bizarre by the whack housing situation. (The low housing intventory, the brokerage firms buying up houses in small towns, and the rise of remote work all making finding a dream house even more of a needle in a haystack.) So, all the pieces did not line up. Though many, many did, and it made following the signs confusing. (We have more work to do on collectively understanding the signs.)

So, there is no move for us. At least right now.

Yes, I am angry. Yes, I am disappointed. Yes, I am sad. And I’m finding ways to work through these emotions. And, my pollyanna rose-colored glasses have me seeing what we do have: a stable job with decent insurance, a house we can afford and has served us well, time to fix the cars that are broken, and the icing on the cake … a school my son likes. And, maybe most importantly, I have a lovely, oh so lovely, group of wisdom seekers who I can call my Pacific Northwest family. Thank YOU all for being a part of my life and making staying, when I wanted to go, so much more bearable.

Here’s to another year of not driving in the snow.

P.S. The things I’ve done since there’s no move for us:

  • Got some sweet headshots done by a lovely local photographer (Chelsey Dorr Boudoir, though these weren’t boudoir!).
  • Attended Alanis Morisette’s 25th anniversay concert for Jagged Little Pill with a new friend.
  • Watched Levi successfully start 9th grade in a school that’s set up for work AND study (COVID delays some things).
  • Finally went to Sunriver. This with a friend where it was moms’ weekend way and we caught doTERRA’s evolve convention.
  • Rallied for child care for the job-job I’m currently holding down. Met some lovely people who were happy to share their stories and thank Senator Patty Murray.
  • The kid can continue his Aikido studies at the Odd Fellows.

16 Comments

  1. Karen Huck

    I’m sorry the move didn’t happen. We are moving to CA in two weeks, everything seemed to align and we will be closer to family. I love it here so it’s hard but the right thing to do.

    Reply
    • Michelle Lasley

      Thank you so much, Karen! I am glad things lined up well for you so you can be closer to your family. Safe travels.

      Reply
  2. Florence

    Michelle I am glad you get to stay close to us physically. Although I understand the want to go back to your roots. I think many times how Roger and I had dreamed about going back to our roots in Hood River, sadly we never did. Instead we grew roots in SW Washington ♥️

    Reply
    • Michelle Lasley

      Thank you so much for the comfort in your story. I am so grateful for our family here. I have a need to manifest more abundance to feel more free to travel.

      Reply
  3. Mari Bartoo Jacobson

    I love the photo of you with the leather bag!! It captures your beauty and your spirit
    .

    Reply
    • Michelle Lasley

      Thank you! It’s the first PLG bag the husband gifted me. I love that it’s a local outfit especially since I take a bag with me EVERYWHERE.

      Reply
  4. Megan De Salvo

    I understand how disappointing things feel when you wish for them so much to be so. I too went to the Alanis concert, such a great show!

    Reply
    • Michelle Lasley

      Regarding Alanis, I had no idea it was the therapy I needed. 🙂 Reconnecting with my early twenties, my solo apartment, so many memories blasting her music off my little boombox.

      Reply
  5. Melissa Bird

    Ohhhh yes. Sometimes surrender is all we can do! Thank you for sharing this story! I am gonna link it on the twitters!

    Reply
    • Michelle Lasley

      thanks for reading and sharing your thoughts AND for the twitters 🙂

      Reply
  6. Colleen Salchow

    I’m sending you positive vibes Michelle!

    Reply
  7. Kary Meredith

    Changes can be hard and sometimes having your heart set on making a change when it doesn’t happen can be even harder. I know that things align as they are meant to sometimes but that doesn’t always make it easier to roll with the punches. Selfishly I am glad you are staying in the PNW. Sending all the best vibes to you and your family!

    Reply
    • Michelle Lasley

      Yes they can! Thank you for being a part of our PNW family. 🙂

      Reply
  8. jacki

    As a midwesterner, I feel you. Portland has changed so much from when we first arrived about 15 years ago. I have no desire to live in the Chicagoland suburbs but I do miss my family. Can you plan a visit? I know we just managed to plan a 2 week trip home for the holidays inwhich I will close shop and not work my day job and my partner can work reportly, like ususal for a few days. Trying to take advantage of some of the unique challenges these strange times have presented us. Wishing you the strength to proccess and unpack all the feels! <3

    Reply
    • Michelle Lasley

      Thank you so much! Looking at the logistics of a visit to hit all the important people. It takes time, so just assessing when the time can be taken.

      Reply

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