There were a few things I was deeply concerned about when becoming a parent. Poop and vomit. I generally hate vomit. I learned to find my alcohol limit simply because I hate the act of throwing up. I didn’t know how much I would begin to hate poop, though, until I became a parent.
When Levi was born, I was less concerned. I was more aware of cleanliness and ensuring there were no messes left behind. No one told me about the navigation one must do around squirmy infant legs! You don’t give a 3 month old a time out for not listening! Their hearing and site is not where it should be to have that level of expectation!
Once you bring baby home, though, you get used to the green, the green black, the tan, and all the myriad colors of baby poop. Some days you change him 6 times. Slowly working up towards fewer outfits used in a day. You understand why people kept gifting you onsies, even though you thought 5 packages was plenty.
Time rolls on, the bowel movements change and maybe become less frequent. That is, instead of 5 times a day, you’re down to 3 or even 1. Maybe a first birthday rolls around, and suddenly you are in the “potty training” realm of the world. It dawned on me, about this time, that I wouldn’t be changing diapers forever. I didn’t cling to that thought, hearing repeatedly from others that boys take longer than girls. I tried to dismiss the stories from my friends who had girls potty trained long before Levi showed interest.
At two years old, he learned the mechanics through his first short stint at preschool. As we spent more time at home, his desire exponentially decreased. I didn’t want to force it, and I have been unable to this day to summon the giddiness some moms naturally feel towards the act of going potty.
Why am I rehashing this tired subject? A friend with newborn twins was oohing and awing over their now cute poop. I didn’t want to crash her facebook party and suggest it wouldn’t last. She’ll learn or figure it out soon enough. It’s fascinating though, how our expectations track our children’s’ development. For us, our desire for Levi to listen better, focus better, potty better, all tracks a step or two behind where he should be developmentally. And poop has been no different. We know that potty training is an accident ridden roller coaster. There are good weeks and bad weeks.
So, given that, why do we get so mad when he soils his underpants when he should have known to go in the potty? For us, it partly has to do with his annoying hives bit. 80% of hives are unknown, but we know that his hives are in some part linked to his pee and fecal matter hanging about when it ought to be in the toilet. Levi’s poop, when it has prolonged contact with his body, is likely making him break out in hives. So, the more the the pottying is done in the toilet, the better.
Ultimately, this is a post requesting patience from, as my friend Olivia likes to say, my inner Momma Zen. Celebrate the successes and remember it wasn’t so long ago that poop wasn’t gross.
- Potty Training at 35,000 Feet (michellelasley.net)
- Getting your preschooler to eat fruits and veggies (babyshrink.com)
- Naked Counts (michellelasley.net)