Four Years Ago

by Michelle Lasley

Michelle Lasley is a mother, wife in Pacific Northwest learning to balance green dreams with budget realities.

July 19, 2011

Getting drawn on.

Getting drawn on.

Here is the obligatory annual Cristi reflection.

Not a day goes by where I don’t think of my late sister. Not a day goes by where I don’t stop to wonder what life would be like to grow older with the sister who was closest to my twin. Not a day goes by where I don’t stop to ponder where she mustered the patience to do all that she could do. Not a day goes by where I don’t yearn for another conversation with her. Not a day goes by where I don’t wish that she could see the neat things I’ve done and how amazing my son is. Not a day goes by where I don’t wish she could know my husband, growing to know him in similar ways that I am, watching our relationship mature, since she was the first where I shared my initial crush.

Not a day goes by where I don’t just simply miss her.

Domestic violence kills. Domestic violence is silent. Domestic violence crosses all class, race, ethnic lines. Learn the red flags. Learn about warning signs. Donate to a shelter in your town.

This is preventable death. Don’t let this happen to you.

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Peter and I were barely working between the two of us, he had been laid off and with struggles feeding Levi I was barely pulling 5 hours a week. We were at the DHS office applying for food stamps when Peter got the call that yes indeed TriMet was offering him a job. We had been at the DHS office since 7:20 am and we finally got home close to 10:30 am. We barely set our things down, relieved that there was more money in our future and we could at least buy food for our small family when the phone rang. It was my mother. It was one of those phone calls where you just know something is wrong, and how wrong it was. She asked if I was sitting down, and I think I sat down. She didn’t wait to tell me and simply said, “Cristi is dead.”

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