Eggshells

by Michelle Lasley

Michelle Lasley is a mother, wife in Pacific Northwest learning to balance green dreams with budget realities.

August 27, 2010

j

Categories: The Balancing Act

Abrasive. Rude. Always says what’s on their mind. But, if you return the favor YOUR head gets bitten off. Know the type?

I’ve worked with a few, in volunteer and in paid positions.

They have a lot of great things to say, they can be insightful. They can see the big picture. They understand boundaries. But, they don’t listen. I know, it’s weird, right? They can see the big picture and are great observers, but they cannot internalize what other people say or feel.

Sometimes they are good workers bees, so it makes it hard to see them go when eventually they do. Why? Because they can’t sustain lasting relationships. A few that I am remember, really do thrive on external connections. They need other people. They need to be able to talk, to bounce their ideas off others. One person, I am thinking of, never listened for validation. And, here’s where the clincher, for me, comes into play – you had to be extremely careful of what you said around them. Not that gossip was a problem (for some it was), but lest you hurt their feelings.

You had to walk on eggshells. Don’t break any.

Well, they got broken. And, in one instance, I can see where we erred. In the other, it’s much less clear.

We, effectually, ganged up to correct behavior. It was relevant, it was timely. It was handled poorly. The aforementioned irony is that this person does the same thing, hourly, to others. Sure, fine, the tough exterior shell to protect the tender insides. I’m sorry, my mother raised us kids to “think before we act” and to remember to “not dish it out if we can’t take it.” Okay, we didn’t think before we acted. We could have been more intuitive to the situation. But, it was boiling. We’re human. This person has rescinded their work from the organization in which we spend our time. A very passionate, dedicated loss. But, I can’t help but feel a little relief. Why? Because we don’t have to walk on those eggshells (there are others). It’s like we are one step closer to building trust amongst each other once the non-trusting person has left.

I love eggshells in my compost, but that’s about the only place in my life I want eggshells.

Enhanced by Zemanta

0 Comments

Submit a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Read more on this topic…

No Move for Us

No Move for Us

Well, we didn’t move. No move for us. We will be staying in the Pacific Northwest for an unknown amount of time. It could be the rest of the school year, and we try again in the spring, or if the kid thrives at school – we could be looking at another 4 years, minimum. Either way, right now, there is no move for us.

Summer Musings

Summer Musings

In 2007, we looked at where we were and where we wanted to be, and we decided in 10 years, we’d move. My husband moved...

All the World’s a Stage

All the World’s a Stage

All the world’s a stage. This keeps coming up for me. When I read as a lecture during Catholic mass, but especially when I help put on an event. Each space has its directors, its producers, its actors who all play a pivotal role. Each space has its problems and everyone has to pivot. And, the thought has occurred to me – everyone should, yes, I daresay should, take some acting classes in their formative years so they can truly learn the ins and outs of “all the world’s a stage.”

0

Your Cart